Monthly Archives: August 2014

The plum tree designed by wasps, for wasps

plums

I have a gripe with plum trees.

I have two trees, a Victoria and a Cambridge Gage, and I must say this year has been the best I’ve ever had. There are no grubs inside, which was a problem last year affecting the majority of fruit, the Victoria’s are as large as a hens eggs and deliciously sweet, and the Cambridge Gage tree is so bountiful the branches are bending over and touching the ground.

So what’s the problem? The problem is that the plums drop from the tree over two weeks and they don’t store. On top of that, I’ve been eating so many that I have developed permanent stomach ache! (No problems with constipation relating to my painful coccyx then!!!)

I hate the waste. I don’t eat jam, I’m not a big fan of chutney, and all of my friends have trees of their own. Maybe I could make plum sauce, but I am hopeless in the kitchen! So the only choice I have is to freeze them. They are suppose to freeze okay, even whole, but since it’s a new experience, I’m not entirely certain they won’t go to mush.

Having taken a very small percentage, and having given some to the very excited chickens, the rest have fallen to the ground for the wasps, a few honey bees, and the butterflies. The wasps, in particular are in heaven, and don’t even react when I accidentally pick one up in plum. At least they’re happy. Perhaps the tree is not such a poor design after all.

 

 

 

Writing and eating on the toilet seat…

My days have been thrown into turmoil. A couple of days ago I had a little accident, and as a consequence I can’t sit down. How am I expected to write, eat, drive, or watch television? Of course there’s always the toilet seat, that’s comfortable!

A couple of days ago I was walking Stilton, my one year old Standard Poodle dog and was progressing down a steep grassy slope, when in a flash, my feet went from beneath me and I landed with a THUD on my coccyx. My spine jarred and a bolt of pain rushed through me. Aside a little discomfort, I was okay. Stilton, though, seemed bemused, and looked to me with questioning eyes, puzzling over my choice of resting spot.

Back at home, my first thought was to soothe myself with a cup of tea. (Isn’t it what the English always do?) It was going to plan, until I tried to sit on the sofa. I just couldn’t do it. The pain was incredible. I could sit if my weight was forward, away from my coccyx, otherwise … ooh, the agony.

Try spending one day without sitting. It’s not easy, and certainly not for someone who spends the majority of the day resting on ones backside. I can’t eat meals in a relaxed manner, I have to watch television in a horizontal pose, and I can’t even drink a cup of tea in bed.

Woe is me!!!

So what’s my solution? Play more tennis. 4 hours yesterday, and another 4 today! Well, I might as well do something useful with my time! Perhaps that grassy slope could come in useful after all …